Those who know me well know how tremendously nostalgic I can be (I know for a fact Dale and Stacey have mocked that quality in me enough :D), which leads me to ask myself: How on Earth, after all the "Reflection" and filler blogs of the past, could I possibly forget to indulge in the year where the most change I ever experienced in my life? The answer? I have no idea.
To preface, this year was either going to end up (at the time) either the best year of my life or the worst year of my life. It was really that simple. In late 2003, my mother approached me, telling me the family was moving out of Chicago (to quote her, "maybe even out of state," which thankfully didn't happen) and we'd be spending most of the next year searching for a new home. I was crushed, that everyone thought I could very well leave everything I had established those past twelve years and just casually move on, leave my best friends of eight and six years, etc. So it didn't fly over easily.
After awhile, though, the idea was a bit more inviting, though most of me still didn't want to leave. It was change I had no possible way of preventing, so I had to accept it, even though 80% of me just wouldn't budge. Well, we found a house much sooner than any of us had ever expected (much to my chagrin, the more time we spent looking, the more time I had in Midway), and on February 1, 2004, we made a deal to move into Neuberry Ridge in Lockport, IL. This just so happened to be Super Bowl Sunday, so instead of watching the game with the family, they painted and started fixing up the house, while I quietly sat in my room listening to Rush (I was far from the rabid fan I am today, I even got tired of them and stopped listening for awhile), for the first time knowing I didn't have many more days left in there.
Much of my Spring revolved around telling my friends I was leaving, getting ready for the Cubs to hopefully repeat off their 2003 success, fixing up the house, and just thinking non-stop about everything. Did I take things for granted with people and my time here? I'm not going to see my grandma, grandpa, or uncle much anymore, will I? These thoughts weren't good, thoughts a twelve year old kid should have. And to be honest, the family didn't help. In the process I was mostly an outsider, one who pretty much kept his mouth shut on everything, which worked against me at times because I was needed for things and wouldn't give in, which caused a lot of tension between the family and I. I still stand by that attitude, since mentally, I just wasn't ready for something like this.
But in Spring, some rays of hope shined through. We got a new pup on the last weekend of March, which we named Snickers after much deliberation, who still lights up the house today with her joyfulness. On March 25, my favorite band of the time, Van Halen, announced they were reuniting with singer Sammy Hagar, recording three new songs for a new greatest hits package, and touring North America to support them. This is something my hyper twelve year old self never thought he'd ever see, his favorite singer reuniting with his favorite band. Tickets went on sale Saturday, May 1, and my dad promptly got tickets to the show.
I'll never forget hearing the new single, "It's About Time," for the first time on May 6, 2004 (I remember I was ready to watch the "Friends" finale, a show I never watch but had to see the spectacle as it was so over-hyped). I was sitting in my room, about 6:30 PM, window open enjoying the calm mid-Spring breeze, when Seaver on the Loop said they had a new Van Halen song after the break. Well, after going through "Comfortably Numb," this thick, pulsating guitar riff comes in. I said to myself "Nah, this has got to be some new band." But then, all the sudden, Sammy Hagar's vocals come up and Ed's signature guitar sound becomes apparent. It was the new Van Halen song, and I was stoked. Sure, it came out the day they announced the tour about a month prior, but with the hustle and bustle of moving, this was the first I time had the chance to listen to it. Hearing "Turn your clock back / paint it red on black" gave me hope for the concert on July 19!
May was a spectacular month that year, because I started to see a lot of friends more than usual, just getting as much time as I could in with them before I left, which at this point could've been July, maybe August, maybe even November! I remember spending Dale's birthday with him that year (and spending the weekend by his casa, making fun of our science teacher Mr. Malek's childhood photo and such), which conveniently fell on a Friday and we went to The Pit for dinner. He had announced to me he also got Van Halen tickets for his birthday, which excited us both. I also recall his father asking me if I'd ever heard of a band called "Velvet Revolver," consisting of the guys from Guns N' Roses and the singer of Stone Temple Pilots who were just on Leno the other night. Well, I hadn't, but it was just something else to look forward to. Clearly my musical mentality was growing tremendously at this point, and the weekend prior to Dale's birthday I'd buy my first Motley Crue album, which turned me into the rabid Crue fan I am today.
School eventually let out on June 4 (my last day ever at St. Dans), which just so happened to be the day Mark Prior returned from the disabled list (funny, he gave up only two hits and ended up with a loss). Excellent way to begin the summer already! Mostly everyday over the summer I'd take a walk or take my bike out in the evening, usually meeting up with and hanging out with friends, whether it be just going around, chilling at Byrne, playing baseball, among other things, usually until the night rolled in. My friends made my last summer there incredible, and surely helped me in remembering them as I moved on.
If I wasn't out with them, chances are it was a quiet evening in the house, usually with me cranking out the Loop while I played MVP Baseball 04 on the PS2 or All Star Baseball 05 on the XBOX. I remember the first time I heard the mystery band Velvet Revolver on the radio, when "Slither" debuted on the Loop while I was "modernizing" my Cubs roster on MVP 04. I just remember sitting there thinking "Well damn, that kicked some ass!" This just led to a cycle that was the Contraband (VR's first album) craze I went through surrounding the rest of 2004.
June also meant a new season of Whose Line is it Anyway?, my favorite show of the time. I remember being so stoked for the start of the new season, and it really didn't disappoint (despite the fact that they were all throwaways from past seasons). Sadly, the day after the debut, we had to put our chocolate lab of eight years, Mocha, to sleep. She was always very pleasant and personable (though Sean always felt like she was gonna bite his hands off :D), and it was sad to see her go.
July provided some interesting fireworks (haha, pun). I started the month off by going to a Cubs game on the first, against Houston. I'll never forget Mark Prior pitching a fantastic game in seven innings, with the Cubs up 4-1, and Kent Mercker allowing a three-run homer to Carlos Beltran RIGHT after Prior was taken out, tying the game. Sammy Sosa won it in the ninth with a walk-off homer, luckily. July also meant my last Fourth of July in Chicago. We went up to Wisconsin to buy our illegal fireworks (heh) and put on one last show at the house. I remember retiring early to watch the Cubs / Sox game on ESPN, which the Cubs won in the ninth on a bases-loaded walk taken by Todd Walker. Another great game that week!
I spent much of July doing the same things I was doing in June, only the visits we'd make to the ground where the new house was being built were more frequent, meaning more long trips and more times eating out with the family. I remember one night listening to Motley Crue's "Home Sweet Home," under a cloudless sky on a 70 degree early summer night heading home from the new house area, which was so appropriate considering everything, and pretty much helped me appreciate everything around me just a little more. A reason why I'll never tire of that song.
July 19 came around, which was the date of the Van Halen concert. I was asked recently to rank my Top 5 favorite concerts (since I've seen so many bands) and this came in around the #3 spot. What a great show, caught it in the "magic" period between July 3 and July 20 where not one single show was bad (considering how many awful performances were on this tour thanks to Eddie Van Halen's alcohol problem). Definitely a concert I'll never forget. I also remember going to Best Buy the day after to buy the Greatest Hits package VH released, and mom lost her keys for work at the store. We frantically looked around, and when we gave up, we just cranked VH in the car on the way home.
I remember I spent the following weekend at Dale's the last time I'd see him until he stayed over by my place Thanksgiving weekend. It was awkward at first, and my voice was still shot from the show. But eventually, we got into our niche and just had fun like we always did. Listened to VH, played GameCube (Sonic the Hedgehog, man!), just relaxed. It was a blast, and I'll always remember it as the last time I'd stay there while living in Chicago. The Thursday after that weekend, Uncle Tom and I went to see Spiderman 2 downtown, and figured we'd visit the beauty that was (at the time, brand new) Millenium Park in the process. After returning back to his house, I sat down with my grandpa, watched the Simpsons, Everybody Loves Raymond, and the Cubs game whilst having chicken for dinner. I think that was the last day I spent at their house before moving as well. What a shame.
July ended with the last time I'd hang out with friends. I spent the majority of that Friday (which was July 30) with Kurt Mueller, Jackie Kwasny, and others who came in and out. At the time, I had no idea this would be THE last time I'd really hang out with any of these people (at least until May 2005), but once I actually left, I felt bad that I never got the chance to really add closure to ANY relationship I had out there, not just those two. Still, it was definitely a great night for what it was.
August came around, and nothing too noteworthy happened outside of Greg Maddux winning his 300th game with the Cubs against the San Francisco Giants. I do recall heading out to the area where the house was being built with my mother a few days prior to that, and listening to the Cubs and newly acquired Shortstop Nomar Garciaparra rape the Rockies on the radio. Clearly, I have a lot of fond memories with that 2004 team, despite the fact that they'd become whiney bitches by the end of the year (will explain later).
August 12, 2004: The day my life changed forever. We closed on the house, it was completely built, and we moved in. It was gloomy, perfect fit, really, since that was pretty much the mood of everyone. Just a very somber day all around, and when I said goodbye to that house on 52nd and Nottingham, I realized I was saying goodbye to my history and saying hello to a new beginning, one I wasn't looking forward to.
I started school at Taft, which was a massive dump compared to what St. Dans was, but it was still a nice change of scenery: small town school filled with small town people. Not really my thing, and after five years living here, it still really isn't. Regardless, I made fast friends, and they know who they are. I already indulged in 7th grade in a blog back in October, no need to continue now.
The rest of the year, well, it's a lot like death to birth. A part of me died on August 12, leaving behind all I established and all the friends I'd made. But a part of me had been born again, starting from scratch, everything...different. All I could really remember was my grandpa coming out once a week to pick my sister and I up from school, my Velvet Revolver craze expanding to it's farthest extent, the 2004 Cubs season ending on the worst note possible (89 wins and no postseason because of whiney bitches like Alou, Mercker, Sosa, and Dusty, and of course, losing Chip and Steve as the team's voices didn't help), and establishing a new beginning in my new home.
I was a totally different person at the end of 2004 than I was at the beginning of it, and quite frankly, the person I am today has been a gradual improvement over the one everyone saw at the end of 2004. Every change that happened to me personally in '04 was very rapid, there was really no time to realize it until years later, but the ones that have happened since have been very noticable, since it all comes so slowly.
That's a little insight to those who didn't know about my history before Lockport, and a little insight into how different a person I am because of everything that's happened since the move actually happened. I'll always say that moving out of Chicago was one of the worst things to ever happen to me, since I've never totally felt like I've fit in here in the five years I've been here. But, I've met some fantastic people, ones who I'd hope I can keep around for a very long time (of course, there's VERY few of you guys), and for that, well, at least something good came out of the move.
Still, I have every intention of heading back up there for college, so once I graduate high school, you bet yer ass I'm heading back where I belong. Until that time, eh, I think I'll make the most of what's on my plate now.
-Zach
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