Monday, October 27, 2008

"Role Models" - October 27, 2008

You talk about a strange surge of inspiration. I was watching The Simpsons on DVD last night as I struggled endlessly to fall asleep. I can't tell you the episode title, all I know is, it's the second or third episode on Season 10, I was too dazed to remember. Anywho, the basis of the episode is, Homer's driving and finds out life expectancy in male's has increased and he's "wasted half his life." VERY funny beginning, I was laughing my ass off albeit half asleep. So Lisa teaches him about Thomas Edison, who he develops this obsession for and talks about non-stop, before Marge suggests he becomes more like Edison instead of talking about him.

What happens next is, he quits his job (saying Marge suggested THAT too) and decides to become a full-time inventor in the basement. He puts up a poster of Edison in front of his desk for inspiration.

Now, what relevance does this hold and why exactly am I so into this? While it is ridiculous that Homer Simpson looks at Thomas Edison, of all people, as a role model, the concept itself and the admiration he shows for the guy is, I guess you can say, charming. The Simpsons in the past have been able to evoke personal emotions in the show (in sometimes hidden ways) that sometimes seem so real, or are so similar to life, you just can't help deny just how real it comes off, and how you can relate to that (see "Lisa the Iconoclast" for a better example).

It makes you think about the role models you've had in your life and what they've meant to you at some point or another. Of course my grandfather was #1 and always will be, but that's been established. I'm talking about the person you threw the poster of up over your bed, over your desk, somewhere that you can see it to garner inspiration. It's a very interesting thing if you think about it. That because a person is so popular and has done tremendous things, you can admire them for it.

So that begs the question, who have I considered role models over the years? Well, one of my first was Eddie Van Halen. Outstanding musician, tremendous guitar player, and his music left an outrageous impact on my life at just the right time. I still reflect on the music today, despite the fact that I don't hold either him or the band in the same regard anymore. Frankly, my admiration stops at a number of dickhead moves, and I hate saying this, but he's probably the only "role model" who over the years has truly let me down. And really, it's a shame.

Musically my role models have changed since then, and have remained more steady. I take more after Sammy Hagar and Mike Anthony (ex-singer and ex-bassist of Van Halen) these days, because they had to tolerate the bullshit of the aforementioned Edward Van Halen for so many years, yet were always able to go out and put on the best damn concert possible. Not to mention, meeting them last year was also a definite positive in their regard. There's also Nikki Sixx, the smart lyricist that made Motley Crue more than just a hair band in the '80s music world, who overcame so much adversity just to try and stay alive, and sure enough, he's still out there kickin' ass. Once again, classy guy in person, definitely a great moment for me. We finally end with my "big two" the last couple years, Neil Peart and Phil Collins. Both drummers, both lyricists (though Neil much more profound than Phil), both members of my two favorite bands, and both passionate about the things they do. Never do anything bad to people who cross their paths (well, except Phil to his ex-wives *rimshot*), just go out there, try and keep the fans happy, and give their all everytime they do something. How can that not be respected?

The two biggest things in my life have always been sports and music. Yes, in that order, so naturally my sports heroes have left a much greater impact on me than my music ones have. My first ever sports idol was Sammy Sosa, I think all of us Chicago sports fans can kinda figure what happened there (*rimshot again* I'm wearing the house drummer out tonight!).

Baseball has been my primary source for heroes, and the first one for a very long time (and still kinda is) would be Ken Griffey Jr. So much fun to watch when he was younger, before he was injury prone for the tail end of his career. His days in Seattle were classic, every single game he played there was exciting. He just kinda faded out, which sadly DOES happen. But he was still my first favorite baseball player and really the first sports figure to hold out longevity as a "role model."

Chipper Jones, Cal Ripken Jr., David Justice, Greg Maddux, Kevin Brown, Tom Glavine, all these guys were some of my favorite players back in the day (well, MY day that is). Even more recently, Josh Hamilton and Ryan Braun have climbed that ladder, for Hamilton's overcoming adversity to put up stellar numbers for a, well...bad team, and Ryan Braun's scrappy playing to carry his team to the postseason.

But naturally, you stay true to your home, because that's what you're most familiar with. When Mark Grace left the Cubs (unwillingly, mind you) after the 2000 season, I studied up on him and Ryne Sandberg more. Being a Cubs fan since '96, it's easy for those two to be overshadowed by the uprising of Sammy Sosa. But these guys were just fascinating, and their numbers were stellar in their careers. They instantly climbed up the ladder for me, and eventually would become my two favorite Cubs of all-time, even though they didn't have far to go, since they were both respectively behind Sammy Sosa. Always had a strong respect for both, just took awhile for that to come into full bloom. And meeting Ryne Sandberg really was the icing on the cake, so pleasant in person and just a nice guy. I'd run into him time and time again at the Cubs Conventions and he'd actually be able to recognize me and greet me as if we've known each other our whole lives. That first happened in 2002, and sealed the deal for me, really. November will be the first time I meet Mark Grace but I assume that to be pleasant as well.

Gracie and Ryno are my two favorite idols of all-time, and the greatest role models I ever had. The jerseys, posters, baseball cards, and autographs really tell that story well enough. And hell, we may have both guys with the team next year. Ryno may coach on the Cubs roster if Sinatro leaves, and Mark Grace may replace Bob Brenley as the team's color analyst if he decides to manage the Milwaukee Brewers. That'd be just awesome if both could be a part of the 2009 campaign, and would really be special for me as a Cubs fan. It's just nice to have two down-to-earth athletes as heroes of your's as you grow up, and be able to meet them and develop seemingly personal relationships with them, as if you've been friends for a long time. It means a lot to a fan like myself.

And this ties back with the end and essentially the Simpsons episode. At the end of the Simpsons episode (after Homer found out Edison had one of his ideas but remained undiscovered, so he decided to destroy it at the Edison museum, but couldn't because he saw Edison's picture of Leonardo Da Vinci and realized the relation between he and Edison). Those posters of our heroes we hoist up in our rooms, we're just admiring someone who's exactly like us, even if we don't know them personally. A person who fought towards a dream, and once they caught up to it, took full advantage of it. A person who had the drive to make the most of themselves, someone who deep down shares the same attitudes towards people and life as we do. It goes beyond the fact that they've accomplished so much. It's the fact that, overtime, they're just like us, we're just blind to realize it.

This blog was awful, haha. Jumpy, thoughts all over. But it's meant to convey a point, and when it goes into my book sometime in 2010, it'll be edited, well...better. But I'm sick, so give me a break. Still, it's a concept I've given some serious thought over the past day and it's really interesting how it all works out. I'll have a blog in a couple days, after my birthday on Wednesday, probably. See y'all then!

-Zach

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

"Reflection: 7th Grade" - October 14, 2008

Why 7th grade? Well, to be honest, I couldn't tell you. You all know me, I choose the most unusual times to be nostalgic, but it was one of the best times of my life, hands down, and really tends to be overlooked because it's in between two massive events that really altered my life forever. So it's like the cheese on a sandwich from Subway; you know its there, but you fail to recognize it because its inbetween the Hearty Italian bread and the meat. Cheesy analogy, eh? (pun TOTALLY intended :D)

So how did it all start? I moved out of Chicago on August 13, 2004 (we make note of that everytime that date passes), and started school about a week after I moved. If I could make a guess, and I'm not 100% positive, my first day at Taft (and at a different school for the first time in eight years) was August 21, 2004. It was tough, because I was coming off what could've very well been the best summer of my life, still in Chicago. Talk about a massive shift; moving from a school of 800 people to one of about 350. It was smaller, a bit of a dump (sorry Taft fans, I simply cannot lower my standards), and the people were...different. Was the difference in people necessarily a bad thing? Absolutely not. It was just a shift that, at that point in my life, I simply wasn't used to.

The people were nice, very welcoming, something I hadn't expected (simply because of my upbringing and the society I was surrounded by). Despite being a generally outgoing person, I was nervous as hell my first day there, and I think it could show. For Christ's sake, I didn't even know how to use the locks on the lockers, because for eight years of my life that was never a concern. So as I said, things were different, but it was an environment I could get used to real quickly.

I made some fast friends. Darren and Nicco, both Cubs fans (huge sigh of relief, because living on the South Side as a Cubs fan for twelve years ain't easy) who I'd generally talk baseball with. Leianne, Tiarra, and Kasey, who were in fairness the first people to approach me and really make me feel comfortable where I was. Then there was the person who I considered my best friend for two years, Roberta, who I honestly can't say the same about anymore. Not her fault, moreso mine, but more on that later. I developed a strong foundation pretty quickly.

So this is Autumn 2004, a time when one could proudly wear a Mark Prior 2003 All Star Game jersey without criticism, when people didn't want George Bush to serve a second term but really had no other choice, since his opposition was even worse (and yes, I am a Dem). My Cubs were closing out perhaps the most humiliating season I'd ever seen from them, whiniest and most pathetic group of professional athletes I'd ever witnessed. I also remember, almost every weekend, playing NFL 2K5 when I woke up to about 2 p.m., listening to either the Loop or a CD on my radio filling some time, very relaxing. I also became addicted to Family Guy very quickly, needed something to enjoy at 10:30 p.m. before heading to sleep (still an addiction). To be honest, it's really all I can remember about the time period, hah.

Anywho, time moves on, and things become more and more positive with people I'd become close to, some of which I'd considered best friends. I'd become attracted to Roberta, very strongly, one of the longest attractions to someone I'd ever had. You can't help who you like, which she understood, but I took that to an extreme I really shouldn't have taken it to. As soon as I got over it, things between her and I weren't the same. She'd suggest differently, but I never felt the same afterward, as if I screwed up the solid friendship we already had. They say "live life with no regrets," but sometimes you just do things you wish sometime down the road you can change. And the problem is, you can't. Maybe I'm being too hard on myself, but she was, and frankly still is, one of the most special people I've met in my life, and it's just difficult to swallow the fact that I handled that so carelessly at one point. It'd be nice to still be able to call her a "best friend," but things have just become to distanced between her and I, though like I said, none of that is her fault. If she reads this, I hope she realizes that she's still in my thoughts and very important to me, despite the distance between us.

So, skip the winter, t'was a boring time for the post part. I just remember spending long, cold nights with my Game Boy SP in front of our new TV watching football, filling the void with nothing to do. Motley Crue released new music and began a tour, after becoming a full-fledged fan the last summer, it was quite a treat. I picked up their greatest hits set (Red, White, and Crue) on February 5, 2005 (I still had the receipt, shockingly enough) and would often listen to it while doing homework or watching Arena Football on Saturday afternoons quietly in my room. Those two discs HAVE to be burned out by now, hah. An occasional school event here and there, generally a basketball game with some friends. Not a bad time at all.

Spring was a fucking blast, 'nuff said. I reunited (briefly) with a friend of mine, someone I considered a tremendous friend back in 2nd grade, and her name is Kate. I remember spending hours on end on the phone with her just catching up, whilst playing "ESPN MLB 2K5" on my XBOX. Things with her and I started really well, then we just kinda stopped talking around June (though we picked back up in January 2008, and haven't stopped talking since, very happy about that). In other news, my Cubs showed promise, the Bulls were a genuinely good basketball team for a change and made the playoffs, the NCAA Tournament was a blast because of the Illini making it to the Championship (and getting a cheap loss to those UNC bastards).

Later in the Spring, around May before summer break, was an outstanding time. I held a legitimate relationship with just about anyone you can think of, and even some then-eighth graders moving on to high school. For the first time in awhile, I really felt genuine respect, a feeling that hasn't faded since. It was just nice to be able to have those kinds of relationships with people. We had to do research papers, which I remember writing often while listening to Van Halen's "OU812" album with King of the Hill or Simpsons on the TV. Still the best paper I ever wrote, because the situation was just flawless. I went to see U2 and Sammy Hagar within three days of each other that month, towards the end they had the school olympics thing (which was awesome the first year around, but became really tired by my eighth grade year), and grad dance. Sad to see all those eighth graders leave the school, which is funny because I only associate myself with one these days, and we don't even talk, she's just in my English class this year. Funny how that works, eh?

The summer essentially began the weekend before school finished. I took a trip out to Dale's, first time since New Years and only second time since I'd moved since we did that. He had something going on my first day there, so I spent some time with old St. Dans friends I hadn't seen in a year. That was the perfect start to my summer, so incredible to see all those people again after such a long time (still is, actually). After the grad dance and the end of the year celebrations and such, Steph Lillis invited me to her grad party, which I remember for some strange reason as being a very good day. That following weekend, I went to the Cubs / Red Sox game at Wrigley on June 10, which we graciously won 14-6. I went to St. Dennis' carnival and hung out with Jessy Morgan most of the time the following day which was also a ton of fun. I also developed relationships with two going-on 7th graders (now sophomores) who have left a huge impact on my life, Jenny Jackinoski and Auston Wheets (sp? sorry bro :D), which ended up being a massive highlight to my summer.

Of course, all good things come to an end. This was around the time my grandfather was hospitalized and became very ill, eventually leading to his death. That's the one experience that changed my life forever, and things haven't been the same since. But it's safe to say before that, was easily one of the happiest times of my entire life, hands down, and I have a ton of people to thank for that. Those are the same people who made life easy on me following that tragic June 22 afternoon. The majority of which I still talk to today (Darren, Nicco), some of which I wish remained a part of my life (Leianne, Berta). The last thing I did that summer before spending it in isolation following grandad's passing was Canal Days, which was really fun since I spent most of my time with people who I wouldn't see again until August.

Oh, how things have changed, eh? I still can't believe that was three years ago, unbelievable. A LOT has happened since 7th grade, but it was the silver lining between two massively bad events to occur in my life, a silver lining that lasted a good ten months and I'm damn proud of it. I'm sure half of those people won't read this, but to the ones who left their impact: Thanks. You guys still mean a lot to me and my growth as a human being and I couldn't appreciate it more, and thanks to you all, you made my first year a VERY good one.

This was longer than expected. Well, that's about it, then!

-Zach

Sunday, October 5, 2008

Hunt For Blue October 2008: Miserable Failure

The 2008 Chicago Cubs team was one seeking redemption. In their second season under manager Lou Piniella, not to mention the whole team being together as a whole (minus Jason Kendall, Jaque Jones, and Cliff Floyd, plus Kosuke Fukudome, Reed Johnson, Jim Edmonds, and Rich Harden), this ballclub looked more comfortable together and much more poised to do more than what they did in 2007. And that they did.

The 2008 regular season was, in every sense of the word, magical. Think of all the moments this team had witnessed this season, things that I as a fan had never seen in the twelve-years-and-counting of watching this team. We won our 10,000th game on April 23 in Colorado, via a walk-off homer by Aramis Ramirez. A 19-run shellacking of the Milwaukee Brewers a week later on the 30th. Posting an 18-9 record in the month of April, posting two six-game winning streaks to justify that record. We were down 9-1 against the Colorado Rockies at Wrigley on May 30, before scoring nine runs in the sixth and seventh innings to come back miraculously and win 10-9. The “1948 Game” on June 12 against the Braves, which went eleven innings courtesy of a Jim Edmonds game-tying homer in the bottom of the ninth, only to be won by the Cubs in the eleventh with a bases loaded hit-by-pitch to Reed Johnson to end the game 3-2. The sweep against the crosstown American League rival, the first-place White Sox, at Wrigley (only to be followed by a sweep at the Cell a week later). Rich Harden’s first start as a Cub on July 12 against the Giants, with the Cubs leading 7-0 only for then-struggling set-up man Carlos Marmol to blow that lead, tying it at 7-7 going into extras. The Cubs would win it on a walk-off single by Reed Johnson in the bottom of the eleventh inning. The magical (and then, necessary) sweep of the Milwaukee Brewers at the end of July, burying them to five games behind first place. A back-and-forth game against the Astros on August 5, only to be won thanks to an Alfonso Soriano three-run homer in the bottom of the seventh, widening the gap, eventually winning the game. Outscoring the Braves a week later in Atlanta 29-9, sweeping the season series for the first time in franchise history. A seven game winning streak at the end of August (topped off by an Aramis Ramirez go-ahead grand slam against the Phillies in the sixth victory). The mid-September make-up series in Miller Park against the Astros, which featured the first Cubs no-hitter in 36 years by Carlos Zambrano, as well as a one-hitter thrown by Ted Lilly the next day. A magical game against Milwaukee later that week, on September 18, with the Cubs down 6-2 before shortening the gap to three runs, and closing the gap with a two-out, three-run homer by Geovany Soto taking it to extra innings. The Cubs would win in twelve innings on a walk-off single by Derrek Lee, 7-6. The clinching game on September 20 against rival St. Louis Cardinals. And even after the clinch, we took the New York Mets to extras eventually winning off an Aramis Ramirez walk-off homer, proving to be a deciding factor in the Mets’ Wild Card hopes later on.

Of course every magical season does have a few downsides. Opening the season losing a series to the Milwaukee Brewers certainly wasn’t starting off on the right foot. We lost Alfonso Soriano and Carlos Zambrano here and there to injury (which may be considered a good thing in the long run). We had a downright horrific season against the American League during interleague play, posting a 6-9 record. The team had a rough time after the All-Star break, losing series’ to the Diamondbacks and Astros with serious hitting problems. We went on a six-game losing streak at the end of August entering September. The season didn’t end well, since the team seemed to take it easy, posting a subpar 4-4 record following the September 20 clincher.

Sure, it was magical, and this is the first time I could safely say I saw a real team effort instead of just a few stars stepping up to the plate (excluding 2003). Mark DeRosa put up a Ryne Sandberg quality season at the plate, hitting a career high 21 homers, driving in 87 runs, and posting another solid .285 batting average for his second year as a Cub. Geovany Soto is single-handedly the National League Rookie of the Year, hitting .285, 23 homers, and 86 RBIs, and establishing himself as a quality starting catcher for years to come. Those two have arguably put up a fight to share the Team MVP award this season. Aramis Ramirez, despite some struggles here and there, put together another quality year, hitting .289 with 27 homers and drove in 111 runs—the best on the roster. Jim Edmonds and Reed Johnson created a successful platoon in center field, hitting a combined 25 home runs and driving in 99 runs, perhaps the biggest surprise of the season. Ryan Dempster was successful as a starter, winning 17 games and posting an ERA under three. Ted Lilly also won 17 even considering his early-season struggles, and could safely be considered the ace of this staff after his past two seasons. Rich Harden fulfilled his expectations, going 5-1 with an ERA under two since coming to the Cubs in July. Carlos Marmol had mid-season struggles, but bounced back to remain one of the elite relievers in all of baseball. Sean Marshall, after being converted to a long-relief man, did very well in his relief appearances, and did decently in his spot starts as well.

And like any season, it has its disappointments. Tops would be the $136 million man Alfonso Soriano. Yes, in limited time he hit 29 homers and hit .280, but when he wasn’t on a white-hot streak of hitting, he was really bad. Derrek Lee continued his slumping since the middle of the 2007 campaign, albeit posting a .290 batting average with 20 homers and 90 RBIs. His 27 double plays and .361 on-base percentage don’t bode well, and his inability to get hits when the team truly needs him to come through have really frustrated the fans. Kosuke Fukudome started off tremendously well at the beginning, but tailed off miserably as the season progressed, eventually hitting under .200 for the months of August and September and losing his starting job. Carlos Zambrano came out like a house of fire but really slowed down in the final two months, eventually winning only 14 games and posting a 3.81 ERA. Jeff Samradzija, to me, did not live up to expectations, and was often unreliable as time passed, despite a glimmering 2.28 ERA. And one mention I’ll take a lot of heat for, Kerry Wood. Had a rough start but eventually found fair ground for a good couple months, before a blister injury in July added very unnecessary drama within the club. Since his return on August 5, he hadn’t been the same, posting a 6.75 ERA in the month of September. Despite an attractive total of 34 saves, he still doesn’t appear to have the make-up of a successful closer, blowing six of his forty save opportunities and proving unreliable at certain times.

But despite the disappointments and occasional season struggles, this team was able to win 97 games—twelve more than last season’s total of 85—and be the first National League team to clinch both a division title and home field advantage in 2008. The team looked very promising and ready to succeed, after last season’s Division Series disaster against the Arizona Diamondbacks, being swept in three games and outscored 14-5. To these guys, last season appeared to be a learning experience, as they seemed ready and poised to prove that this team was indeed better than last. Not to mention, the Cubs HAD to make it to at least the NLCS, or the season looks like a regression and therefore, a failure.

They would be faced with the Los Angeles Dodgers, who the Cubs looked very solid against early on but had become an entirely different ballclub since the last time they faced off on June 8. Trades for Casey Blake and Greg Maddux added some postseason experience to the club as well as another bat and arm to a lineup and rotation that looked pretty good already. But the trade that made headlines from July 31 through Game #162 was the one for Manny Ramirez, who cut his hair (somewhat) and wore jersey number 99 for the remainder of the season. He provided nothing but a positive influence on the team, and helped them believe they could win ballgames. So the combination of manager Joe Torre, Ramirez, and Maddux—all three men with tremendous postseason experience—really helped the team in becoming the powerful force they did in the final two months, despite winning only 84 games in the regular season.

So this team provided a challenge, and the Cubs as well as their fans were aware of that. Game 1 of the NLDS was a wash. The game started well, getting Manny Ramirez to ground into a double play, Mark DeRosa putting us ahead 2-0 with a wind-blown homer to right, and an awkward catch by Fukudome in right. Things really looked to be in our favor. Ryan Dempster, however, looked rough, only going 4 2/3 innings, walking seven batters. While his strike zone was inconsistent early on, as the game progressed he kept missing his spots, and the walks did eventually catch up to him, allowing a grand slam to Dodger first baseman James Loney, putting them ahead 4-2. Things only got worse, as Sean Marshall would pitch an effective 2 1/3 innings allowing only one run, a truly remarkable solo golf shot by Manny Ramirez that had to have been hit 450 ft. out of the yard. Jeff Samardzija came in and allowed one more run on singles, and Jason Marquis capped off the game by allowing a solo bomb to Dodger catcher Russell Martin (and almost allowing another by Andre Ethier). The Cubs would go on to lose Game 1 7-2, appropriately on a pop-out by Alfonso Soriano thrown by Cubs fan-favorite Greg Maddux, assumed to be pitching as a “let’s rub it in” move by Joe Torre in the late innings.

Game 2 didn’t prove to be any better, only this time the signs of a loss came very early on. Carlos Zambrano looked good in the first, retiring the side with ease. The top of the second, however, marked the Cubs downfall. It all started with a play at shortstop which Ryan Theriot attempted to bare-hand, when he could’ve easily stuck his glove in front of the ball and made an out, which resulted in a base-runner for Los Angeles. It didn’t get any prettier. Next was a grounder to Mark DeRosa which he muffed at second, when he could’ve easily turned a double play had he succeeded to field the grounder. Then a grounder was slapped Derrek Lee’s way—a play he’d usually make—and it deflected off his glove. The inning was topped off by a bases-clearing double by Russell Martin, and in the blink of an eye, the Cubs were down 5-0. The Dodgers continued to pile on runs (one of which being another solo shot to Manny Ramirez off the box seats in center field) and eventually led 10-1 by the ninth inning (the only Cub run coming off a Jim Edmonds double). Carlos Zambrano turned in a solid start despite fan skepticism, allowing seven runs, only three actually earned. The Cubs tried to come back in the bottom of the ninth, with Mark DeRosa attempting to redeem himself by driving in two runs on a double making the score 10-3. The game eventually ended on a strikeout to pinch hitter Daryle Ward. Just like that, the Dodgers, lead the series 2-0 going into Los Angeles.

Cubs fans and the media still held out hope for Game 3, even though based on the horrendous display of offense the last several games I wasn’t getting my hopes up, personally. I had every right not to. The Dodgers started off strong, courtesy of a James Loney two-run double in the first putting them ahead 2-0 (easily should be considered the NLDS MVP, hands down). The Cubs had so many chances to put something together, having men in scoring position numerous times leading up to the offense just not driving them home. It really was, to say the least, pathetic. Starter Rich Harden looked fine, he missed his spots here and there but for the most part, the runs he gave up shouldn’t have made the difference in this game, considering the opportunities we saw. But they did. With a 3-0 score late in the game, Daryle Ward tried to make a statement by driving in the Cubs’ first run of the game, but sadly that was futile. In the top of the ninth, appropriately enough, Fukudome grounded out and Soriano struck out swinging to end the game. What a way to go down, huh?

Last year’s postseason was a failure, but the season itself can be considered a success. We made a statement that we were good enough to take this team to the next level in 2008. We didn’t do that. We had to do more than just win 97 games in the regular season, we already proved we had a team that could make the playoffs. We had to go out and prove that we could take it further than the first round of the playoffs. We couldn’t do that, which makes this entire campaign, sadly, a failure.

It was a fun season full of magical moments that I, as a fan, will never forget and have been proud to witness, but it doesn’t diminish the fact that we failed our biggest goal this season. And it’s heartbreaking. I wasn’t there for 1984 or 1989. This is the first time I actually felt that, at times, this could be “the year,” just never said it to prevent the jinx (yes, I believe in that, just not curses or Steve Bartman).

But then again, I’ve done the dance before and I’ve seen it in my twelve years of watching this team. I watched us get embarrassingly swept by the Atlanta Braves in 1998’s NLDS, topped off by an eighth inning grand slam by catcher Eddie Perez in Game 3. I watched us get to five outs away in 2003’s NLCS before Alex Gonzalez muffed up a routine double play opening the door to a huge eighth inning for the Florida Marlins, eventually leading to our demise. I saw us go in ridiculously unprepared to last season’s playoffs, and we proved we weren’t ready, getting swept by the Arizona Diamondbacks in the NLDS. This year, I really thought we were more ready for the dance, that we had learned from the mistakes of last year and would try to bounce back from them. I had higher hopes than last year, but being a realist I can’t say I’m too crushed because as a Cubs fan, eventually you just have to expect a collapse. You haven’t won it until you actually win the damn Series, which is why I hated those God-forsaken “Its Gonna Happen!” signs around the ballpark. Looks like those of us smart enough to not get too ahead of ourselves are having the last laugh. No, I’m more frustrated and disappointed than anything, because the team could’ve done special things. They didn’t.

So now we look ahead towards 2009 and what could be fixed. You wish the organization wasn’t stupid enough to give Alfonso Soriano a $136 million contract for as many years as they did, since we signed him as a leadoff hitter with speed. To be perfectly blunt, he sucks at both aspects and provides nothing but a guess hitter at the top of the lineup. He’s no all-star, he’s a hack. We screwed up by not giving Carlos Beltran a big contract in 2005, that way we could’ve avoided the signing or Sorry-ano. Instead, we’re stuck with this guy. That’s your all-star, that’s your team leader. What an embarrassment. The first base position needs an upgrade. I personally respect what Derrek Lee gave this organization but his time has really run out. He’s not the player he was in 2005 or even the beginning of 2007, he’s become older now and he’s losing his stride, so something has to be done. You either give Micah Hoffpauir a chance, who could very well surprise us in a way Geovany Soto did this past season, or you spend money on Mark Teixeira, an established young first baseman who hits the market this offseason. You’re pretty much stuck with Fukudome and I think it’s fair to give him the second chance, since he did prove the potential is there. In center, re-sign Reed Johnson and make him your everyday starter (I give up on Pie, I’m still not sold after two seasons). Why not Edmonds? I think he’s going to retire, and if he doesn’t, I don’t think it’d be wise to take him back anyway (shades of Gary Gaetti ’99, anyone?). If you’re really picky and want to upgrade at short, there are several scenarios that could be played out and I’ll leave that to you all. I’m personally alright with Ryan Theriot as our everyday shortstop for 2009.

Pitching? Try and keep the core of Zambrano, Lilly, Dempster, and Harden at the top. They did tremendously well this season and you really couldn’t ask for more from them (maybe “Z,” but that’s a bit picky). For the fifth spot, hold an audition between Jeff Samardzija (that IS why we signed him), Sean Marshall, and Rich Hill (give him another shot, I still think he’s got it). Try and shop Jason Marquis around, he’s done well as the #5 starter and will be valuable somewhere else. As far as the pen is concerned, I will not shed any tears if Kerry Wood doesn’t return, but we all know that he’ll be re-signed in the coming days anyway, so who cares? Brian Fuentes and David Weathers, two quality and experienced relievers, become free agents next season. Try and buff up the obvious weak spot on the roster with one of those two, it can only go up from where it is now. Don’t even waste your time on Bob Howry anymore.

Changes need to be made. Jim Hendry made minimal ones after 2007 and look where it got us. I’m talking BIG changes, changes that will alter the focus of this team for the better, take for example the Manny Ramirez signing in Los Angeles and how that impacted the team so positively. We need something different, instead of the same guys walking in and blowing people away in 2009, only to slump in the postseason yet again.

It’s been a good year, but a failure. As a fan, I’m hoping I can step into my thirteenth year feeling good about it, but frankly, after this past offseason (and the past seven or eight), going into the Cubs Convention in January saying “this just might be it,” I’ll be saying “You failed the past two seasons. I don’t care if you win 120 games, it’s not going to look like a serious effort until you win a playoff series.” Damn right I’ll be more critical, and next year it’ll be taken to a different extreme, and extreme even I probably won’t be too familiar with. I am, however, happy with Lou Piniella. He still keeps a cool head and knows how to manage this ballclub and keep their heads in the game, and one has to respect that. He's done a great job these past two seasons and hopefully he gives us the same success in the next two.

It’s gonna be a long, cold offseason my friends. Just sit back and enjoy the rest of October baseball and what it has to offer. The Rays are looking good, as are the Red Sox, and the Dodgers are red hot. As far as the Cubs are concerned, I’ll still hold out hope, I’ll still attend games and the Cubs Convention, I’ll still watch the games and support my team. But damned if I can even get sucked into the trap I got sucked into this season ever again. It’ll be an interesting offseason, with the sale of the team and the ballpark, moves that will be made. We’ll see where this takes us. But right now, as I said, let’s just enjoy the rest of what October baseball has to offer and relax, before we worry and stress over “next year.”

2008 Team MVP: Mark DeRosa / Geovany Soto / Jim Edmonds and Reed Johnson - What DeRosa and Soto were able to provide in the middle of the lineup was absolutely huge, and the platoon of Edmonds and Johnson--two guys who weren't even at Spring Training--has proven to be a massive success for the club this season. It'd be a disappointment to not recognize those two along with DeRo and Soto as far as value to the team.

2008 Team Cy Young Winner: Ted Lilly - To go through what he did during the early part of the season and still manage to post 17 wins is remarkable, in every sense of the word. "Bad Lilly" only showed up a few times after April, but for the most part he was consistent on the road and at home, something that can't be said for Ryan Dempster.

2008 Team Most Improved Player: Ryan Dempster - It's pretty obvious. I thought he was horrendous as our closer, but winning 17 games and being so dominant at home really made things much easier on the team to win games. Good call, Lou!